2011年12月24日土曜日

THG Presents: The 2011-2012 NBA Preview!


At THG, we love celebrity gossip. We also love sports. And we especially love when the world of celebrity gossip collides with the world of sports.

Never is this more prevalent than on the NBA hardwood, and not solely due to the Kardashians! Therefore, with the season finally tipping off tomorrow, we present the definitive 2011-2012 season preview. Trust us, gossip lovers, there are more reasons why you should care than you may realize...

Lamar Odom on the MavsKris Humphries on the Nets

BOSTON CELTICS   
Key losses: Glenn Davis, Jeff Green (heart surgery)
Key additions: Brandon Bass, Chris Wilcox
Key celebrity gossip related question: Can Rajon Rondo move on from the fact that President Obama dissed his shooting ability during a Boston-based fundraiser last year? (Really, this happened.)

NEW JERSEY NETS   
Key losses: Brook Lopez (broken foot), Travis Outlaw
Key additions: Jordan Williams (rookie), MarShon Brooks (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will Kris Humphries attempt to void his contract after 72 days?

NEW YORK KNICKS 
Key losses: Chauncey Billups
Key additions: Tyson Chandler, Mike Bibby
Key celebrity gossip related question: Who will get more face time, Coach Mike D'Antoni or Carmelo Anthony's wife and Kim Kardashian's BFF, Lala Vasquez?

PHILADELPHIA 76ERS 
Key losses: Nikola Vucevic (Rookie)
Key additions: Antonio Daniels
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the potential divorce between new partial owners Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith disrupt team chemistry?

TORONTO RAPTORS
Key losses: The approximately 50 that will stack up this season.
Key additions: Rasual Butler
Key celebrity gossip related question: Lacking a star point guard, will they give Canadian native and Celebrity All-Star Game MVP Justin Bieber a look?

DALLAS MAVERICKS 
Key losses: Tyson Chandler, JJ Barea, Caron Butler
Key additions: Vince Carter, Lamar Odom, Delonte West
Key celebrity gossip related questions: Seriously, did West bang LeBron's mom during the 2010 playoffs or what?!? What kind of defense will Coach Rick Carlisle draw up to stop E! cameras from entering the huddle?

HOUSTON ROCKETS
Key losses: Pau Gasol, after the league screwed the Rockets out of a three-team deal involving Chris Paul
Key additions: Samuel Dalembert
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the team aim to increase attendance by hiring native Beyonce to sing the national anthem... for every home game?

MEMPHIS GRIZZLIES
Key losses: Darrel Arthur (to injury)
Key additions: Rudy Gay (from injury)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the comparisons of team members to Jersey Shore cast members hurt or help the squad?

NEW ORLEANS HORNETS
Key losses: Chris Paul, David West
Key additions: Eric Gordon, Chris Kaman
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the allure of giant breasts on Bourbon Street distract fans from filling up the arena?

SAN ANTONIO SPURS
Key losses: George Hill
Key additions: Kawhi Leonard (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Can Tony Parker stop having sex with the wives of his teammates?

CHICAGO BULLS
Key losses: Carlos Boozer's scoring ability in last year's playoffs
Key additions: Richard Hamilton
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will Derrick Rose overcome his role in this strange Adidas story?

CLEVELAND CAVALIERS
Key losses: Baron Davis
Key additions: Kyrie Irving (rookie), Tristan Thompson (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: How many LeBron James' jerseys can one city burn?

DETROIT PISTONS
Key losses: Richard Hamilton
Key additions: Brandon Knight (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Can super fan Kid Rock attend every single home game?

INDIANA PACERS
Key losses: No one. They should be really good this year, actually.
Key additions: David West
Key celebrity gossip related question: Do local stores carry XXXXXL jerseys for super fan Gary Shirley?

MILWAUKEE BUCKS
Key losses: Corey Maggette
Key additions: Mike Dunleavy Jr.
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the Bucks dedicate the season to former resident and THG favorite Molly Mesnick?

ATLANTA HAWKS
Key losses: Jamal Crawford
Key additions: Tracy McGrady
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will single players be actively pursued by gold-digging Real Housewives of Atlanta?

CHARLOTTE BOBCATS
Key losses: Money out of owner Michael Jordan's wallet during various golf course wagers.
Key additions: Corey Maggette, Kemba Walker (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: With native daughter Emily Maynard rumored to be the Bachelorette, will promos be shown during time outs?

MIAMI HEAT
Key losses: Mike Bibby
Key additions: Shane Battier
Key celebrity gossip related question: Which will be higher, Chris Bosh's rebounds per game or the number of court orders to block Alison Mathis from going on Basketball Wives?

ORLANDO MAGIC
Key losses: Brandon Bass, Gilbert Arenas
Key additions: Glen Davis
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will Dwight Howard's impending free agency and/or baby mama drama drag the team down?

WASHINGTON WIZARDS
Key losses: Chris Wilcox
Key additions: Ronny Turiaf, Jan Vesely (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will gridlock in the capitol carry over to gridlock on the court?

GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS
Key losses: Their dignity (see question below)
Key additions: Mark Jackson (head coach)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the flaws in their defense be as exposed as the texted junk of Monta Ellis?

LOS ANGELES CLIPPERS
Key losses: Eric Gordon
Key additions: Chris Paul
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will the number of linked-to Chris Paul-to-Blake-Griffin-alley-oops crash Facebook?

LOS ANGELES LAKERS
Key losses: Lamar Odom
Key additions: Josh McRoberts
Key celebrity gossip related question: Higher total: Lakers' victories, including the playoffs, or the number of millions Vanessa Bryant will bank in her divorce settlement?

PHOENIX SUNS
Key losses: Vince Carter, Aaron Brooks
Key additions: Shannon Brown
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will Steve Nash be too distracted by his cute new girlfriend to properly run the show?

SACRAMENTO KINGS
Key losses: Omri Casspi
Key additions: John Salmons, JJ Hickson, Travis Outlaw, Jimmer Fredette (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Can Jimmer Mania grow into a bigger phenomenon than Bieber Fever?

DENVER NUGGETS
Key losses: Raymond Felton, J.R. Smith, Wilson Chandler
Key additions: Rudy Fernandez, Andre Miller
Key celebrity gossip related question: Why haven't they already signed the chosen one, Tim Tebow, to a contract?

MINNESOTA TIMBERWOLVES
Key losses: Sebastian Telfair, Lazar Hayward
Key additions: J.J. Barea, Brad Miller, Ricky Rubio
Key celebrity gossip related question: Can fans recover enough from Kim Kardashian's dissing their state to leave the house and attend games?

OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER
Key losses: Byron Mullens
Key additions: Reggie Jackson, Lazar Hayward
Key celebrity gossip related question: Nothing. It's Oklahoma City.

PORTLAND TRAIL BLAZERS
Key losses: Brandon Roy, Patrick Mills
Key additions: Jamal Crawford, Nolan Smith (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: Will they garner extra attention by trying out a few neon uniforms, courtesy of the University of Oregon?

UTAH JAZZ
Key losses: Ronnie Price
Key additions: Josh Howard, Enes Kanter (rookie)
Key celebrity gossip related question: How much impact will the two-year loss of native David Archuleta affect the fan base?

Source: http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2011/12/thg-presents-the-2011-2012-nba-preview/

Amy Smart Ana Beatriz Barros Ana Hickmann Ana Ivanovi Ana Paula Lemes Ananda Lewis

0 件のコメント:

コメントを投稿